My Anxiety Tips

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If you aren’t a regular reader here you won’t know my anxiety history. I’ll leave my story of how it started here incase you want to have a nosey.

Let’s just say I’ve had it for going on 2 decades and I’ve picked up some helpful coping strategies.

❤️ When you feel an anxiety attack coming on, try and get out into the fresh air and sit down if possible. I get hot and lightheaded in an attack so fresh air and somewhere to perch my bum is much needed.

❤️ The main thing is to concentrate on your breathing to try bring it back to normal. So breath in for 4, hold for 7 and let out for 8. I thought oh my goodness I can’t breath in for that long. But it really does work.

♥️ I have always found music to be the perfect distraction when I’m anxious. In particular I like soft music like acoustic or love songs. Songs that have great lyrics you can focus on. I also love listening to a crackling fire on the relaxing sounds app. Alternatively if you want loud music to try drown out the anxious thoughts that helps too in my opinion.

♥️ You’ve all heard of the grounding tip of things you can see etc using all your senses. Well I’ve come up with this one.

In your bag have something that has a scent that makes you happy like your fave perfume or cologne. I do love lavender too so some essential oils are really handy too.

Have your happy photos on your phone in a folder easily accessible so you can look at them to bring your emotions back to not being stressed out.

Your phone will come for the next two senses which is listen – so it could be the music I mentioned, or some affirmations that you can pre record to remind yourself that everything is going to be ok.

Your mouth without a doubt will be dry in an anxiety attack so popping your favourite sweet in will definitely calm you down, tried and tested by me.

Last sense is touch. There are so many stress relievers out there on ebay/ wish / amazon. Having that at hand in your bag will come in so handy if that’s all you can manage to get during your attack.

♥️ Reach out and ask for help or just message/call someone you trust and say help me take my mind off things, distract me, make me laugh. Pretty sure you have one person you can turn to.

I really could go on and on and on but I think I’ll leave it there.

I’m always here for any of you if you feel the need to chat.

Hope this has been of some help.

Til next time

Prepping for my operation

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I say I am not scared but deep down I’m bricking it.

So on Friday I had to go to hospital to get ‘marked up ‘ which means they get a permanent marker and draw on where they think my stoma will go to and how high I wear my trousers so this is what my tummy looks like at the mo.

On Saturday I had to have my last substantial meal but also 3 of these build up drinks called fortisips. Luckily I like the 2 flavours they gave me – Apricot and vanilla. I must say it was hard drinking them as they are like a milkshake but fill you up a lot more.

I tried to distract myself from thinking too much about it and watched a bit of eye candy on the TV – Micky Flanagan. I know he’s not your typical hunk but there’s just something about him 😍

Today’s Sunday and I’ve got to seriously get sorted because tomorrow is the day.

I have to make sure all is packed in my bag the essentials and mum said she can bring things up at a later date when I’m feeling a bit more human. I have to stop eating properly at 2pm and can have jelly and ice cream til midnight if I am hungry. The dreaded drinks I have another 6 to drink today and then 2 Monday in the morning before surgery.

I’m going to enjoy a nice soak in the shower as I dunno when I’ll be able to have my next one. I bought Bohemian Rhapsody on DVD so that’ll be tonight’s viewing before I attempt to get a bit of shut eye before my 5am wake up call.

I’ve got some scheduled blog posts for 2 weeks so I hope you’ll enjoy them.

Don’t ever suffer in silence like i did

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Throughout my life, if I am being honest I have suffered quite a bit other than my health over the 33 years of my life.

Here are a few I’ll mention:

  • Bullied severely at school – police were involved come the end
  • Taken advantage of whilst drunk -shame on them
  • Sexually abused – Don’t worry I’m fine, there will always be wrong’uns
  • Had depressive moments – needed medication and outpatient therapy

I will forever remember these times it’s not easy to just forget those times in my life but it won’t ever define who I am or let it ruin my life. It happened and I can’t change what happened in the past.

I can however help those people who are struggling themselves. It’s the caring side of me. I wished I had more people about in my times of need. I had a few but not that one person who I could tell everything to.

HAVE A LISTEN TO ME

Please remember that there are people out there who can help you whether they are just an ear to listen, someone in a profession that can help you in the right direction or a friend/family member.

Believe it or not, they’ve probably encountered one of your problems and can aid you back to smiley happier you.

If you ever need someone to chat to online feel free to inbox me on the below social media pages

Thanks for stopping by

Til next time

Just breathe…Don’t panic

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Over the last few days i have needed to try something a little different to unwind.

My health has been rather pants of late. My body paralysis has been a bit all over the place and my bladder is being evicted in a few months…you know back in the health update saying we were trying to dodge a big op…well it’s got rather desperate and am in need of a urostomy – a pee bag. So anxiety has been a bit erratic as you can imagine.

So i have changed the way i try to relax. Using a few apps on my phone

INSIGHT TIMER

It gives you guided meditation for all sorts of different aspects of life and i really like the timer part of it. You set the time and the sound you find soothing and away you go.

DAYLIO

If you want to keep a track of your moods and activities to look back on then the daylio app is great. As you can see you can edit your moods as i have and also the activities are editable too – still need to do mine. You can also add a little bit about your day too, like a diary. I like it so far.

Don’t be afraid to change bits of your routine to help you along the way.

Thanks for stopping by

Til next time

Beat the January blues

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I’m speaking from past experiences but doesn’t January just put you out of sorts. Literally at the stroke of midnight New Year’s Eve and bam 💥 you’re in another month…another year nonetheless and I know some people just hate change. It’s like you are expected to put on a happy face and celebrate…

Don’t be ashamed, it’s ok to feel underwhelmed.

Here are 10 things to do to help you feel a little more happier if only a little bit

  • Write down 5 things that immediately bring a smile to your face
  • Eat your favourite meal – whether you cook it or order it in
  • Look through photos that hold great memories
  • Give yourself a little pampering – you’re worth it
  • Give your bedroom/living space a makeover
  • Phone a friend and just chat – it’s good to talk
  • Make yourself a playlist of music that gets your heart singing as well as you
  • Order yourself a few items of clothing, It’s surprising how much of a difference it can make to your mood
  • Get writing. Whatever is on your mind write it down, it’s s great form of self reflection and therapy.
  • Plan a day/evening out with a friend or family member. It’ll do you good to let your hair down.

Look at January like this it’s half way through the month  now. You’ve made it this far. So take it day by day and appreciate the littlest things that do make you grin.

Always feel free to DM me on my twitter or instagram page below

Til next time my sweet ones

Its just not fair

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Yes i know my hair is a little fly away but today that’s how i feel.

I wish i could fly away from all the upset in my life and land on a private island – sounds appealing doesn’t it.

I hate that over the last few years my poor health has taken over with my bladder, my neurological condition and the will to just walk miles around the shopping centre – but I’m so thankful that a wheelchair still gives me independence.

My days are always controlled by when my body paralysis will hit, how bad and for how long.

I spoke to my Dad on the phone earlier. He has vascular dementia and it was not the conversation i wish i was having with him.

I wish i was saying lets go on an adventure like we used to Dad. It’s so damn sad.

Only last month i lost my big brother who had battled cancer twice and this time it took him. It always pains me when its always the best people it happens to and not the bad buggers locked up.

Illness affects everyone i know that but it truly sucks when it’s yourself and your family that seems to suffer so much.

Tomorrow will hopefully bring a better day and I’m probably just having a bit of a crappy one today.

Rememer it’s ok to not be ok

Til next time

Look at the sky tell me what do you see – MENTAL HEALTH TALK

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To you looking at these pictures below they may just look like different times of the day. But i want you to look at them slightly differently.

This picture symbolises a good day to someone who suffers with any sort of mental health issue. They may not have many of them but this shows that there are brighter days and just to keep the faith as the saying goes.

This is on their not so good days and when they may need someone to reach out and let them know that they are not alone and everything will be ok eventually.

Then there are those that see this and everything is dark, out of focus and can’t see which way to go. This is when you really need to take action for the person suffering so badly. They need to see that brighter sky again and sometimes just on their own they don’t have the courage or strength to do it. That’s where you can be the light at the end of the tunnel.

Don’t forget you may be having the best day where someones living their worst. Find a heart to help anyone in need.

Thanks for stopping by

Til next time

Let’s get spiritual

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I am only just getting into finding out about all things spiritual.

You see i have had alot of upset in my life of late and i am one to be positive and at peace with things as you all know.

Its come to mind that when i want a bit of a a chill out sesh and not sleep just to get in a different mindset i thought I’d try out some spiritual stuff so I’m just as new to it as you.

I have found 12 gemstones i want to get that have different meanings and properties to them.

Here they are

  • Onyx- Blocking negativity, patience, determination
  • Rose Quartz- unconditional love, emotional healing, compassion
  • Amethyst- Intuition, balance, higher wisdom
  • Opal- inspiration, creativity, aids pain
  • Citrine- Brightness, positivity, clearing
  • Lapis Lazuli- psychic vision, celestial energy, nobility

  • Topaz- affection, sweetness, disposition
  • Aquamarine – luck, fearlessness, protection
  • Jade – purity, friendship, peace
  • Garnet- Self esteem, victory, eternal love
  • Bloodstone- Alignment, Generosity, good fortune,
  • Agate – self confidence, mental strength, calmness

I really want to get all 12 but need to find a decent place to find them. I truly do think if you believe in the magic of them they can work for you.

Til next time

AUGUST FAVOURITES – Currently Loving

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Well what can I say August has been a whirlwind of a month where my health is concerned and visits to hospital but I always find good things to cheer me up each month.

So here are the few things that either bought me a smile or just helped me in some way


I thought we would start of with a food favourite, which would be a packet of whichever flavour French fries (I like them all) and some low fat humus that you can buy a mini pack of 3 from Morrison’s. This is definitely my go to snack at the mo. I don’t feel so guilty pigging out on this as I would on a cornetto (which is also another fave)

After coming out of hospital last week I had been saving my pennies for something that would cheer me up and I defo needed cheering up so this beauty is now mine. It’s a iPad 9.7 2018 edition which is the best priced iPad if you don’t want to splash out on. I have all my favourite apps on it and watching Netflix on it or YouTube is just lovely.

To go with it I got myself a cover to protect it as I am known to drop things and all the cases that I seen on Amazon weren’t floating my boat and then I saw this flamingo one and I was like yes yes and yes. I really love it and I hope it lasts a long time as I hate it when they start cracking down the spine bit.

A totally weird thing to have as a favourite, but I picked this up in Flying Tiger. It’s a stress cheese with 2 mice in it. It actually does help my anxiety because you are concentrating on getting the mice out of the cheese and not thinking about the panic/anxiety attack itself, I think it was £3 and I think it’s so worth it. Flying Tiger have some really awesome little gadgets and bits that you will find handy. They aren’t online but you can always search for your nearest store.

This is one of my favourite quotes I have stumbled across this month. It keeps me positive and know that whatever life throws at me I got this quote to spur me on. I always think that quotes can help you on so many levels. Have yourself a little collection on your phone or in a book.

This is well cheesy but the song gets me singing along and I always loved steps growing up dancing around my kitchen or living room to 5,6,7,8 or tragedy. It’s really good when an old band from your childhood reunites as it’s a bit nostalgic and you can’t help but think of those good times. Please don’t judge me.

There you have it a few random things that have perked up my August.

Get your winter warmers out, autumns coming and I can’t wait it’s my favourite season of all.

Health Update

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I thought it was a while since i gave you an in depth chat about my health in general.

If it’s the first time you are reading my blog i haven’t enjoyed good health for about 6 years, but i rarely let it get me down.

ANXIETY

Of late i have been having some quite bad panic attacks right out the blue, at anytime of the day or night. I have been using distraction techniques like using a squidgy stress toy or the breathing app on my phone to get me back to normal. To be honest, just some fresh air sometimes helps me feel better. Anxietys the one illness that prevents me from being an independent woman and i hate it

FUNCTIONAL NEUROLOGICAL DISORDER

This has only been since last july. It literally happened in a blink of an eye. My legs just paralysed and now they go in and out of paralysis it sometimes affects my arms/hands. Mainly my legs though. I’ve had 2 episodes of loss of speech and a non epileptic seizure. To put FND in layman’s terms the signals sometimes don’t get to a certain part of my body causing them not to function. This has left me needing a wheelchair 3/4 of the time. I won’t let it defeat me.

BLADDER

I have a bladder stoma which is now 3 years old. My bladder went into severe retention and i couldn’t wee. I knew having my stoma would cause problems and I’m in and out the hospital with it but I’m so thankful it saved my life. We are keeping our fingers crossed that i don’t need my bladder enlarged as it will be one hell of an operation.

M.E

Alot of people don’t get what M.E is and just think its chronic fatigue. My voice goes for days at a time if i over exert on something that someone else may not find that strenuous and could land me in bed for up to a week. I find when its bad i can’t string a sentence together without getting mixed up. In this heat my muscles have ached which is new for me but all i can do is rest and wish for a cure one day.

There you have it, my health and me.

Sometimes you are dealt a crap hand and its your choice weather to fight it or give up.

Everything is worth fighting for