Posted in journaling, lifestyle, Personal, reflection

Day in the life…

I say day in the life, this isn’t a typical day it’s what happened today.

I had to get up super early as we are having our ensuite made into a wet room so I can manoeuvre about a bit as our shower was tiny and when my mobility is crap it wasn’t very practical. So the work men have been in since Monday.

Mum had to wash my hair over the sink in the kitchen this morning, luckily it’s short and doesn’t take too long.

Then mid morning I had to go have some blood tests as after the op I had they need to do it every 3-4 months to keep an eye. I’m also getting tested for diabetes as I’ve not been feeling full par of late and a few symptoms of type 2 are what I’m experiencing. I’ll let you know what that outcome is.

So naughty I know but mum treated me and her to a chippy lunch. We normally have one naughty day and that was today. It was really yummy.

My anxiety and chronic fatigue has been playing up lately so I took myself up to my room this afternoon and just led on top of my bed and tried to zone out… Bit hard with the banging from the work men but it’ll be worth all the noise.

Still wearing this smile at the end of the day.

Gonna say nighty night and I hope you all have had a great day.

Til next time

Posted in Confidence, Health, Positivity, words of wisdom

Be brave, be bold, be you

Today I braved a bare face and then thought I’d put my new bikini on and show my urostomy bag too.

OK its only just peeping over the top but I felt confident and thought I’d take the opportunity while it was there.

I want to also say: Embrace your beauty flaws and all. You only have one body so appreciate it very very much inside and out 😘

Sorry its only a short and sweet post.

Til next time

Posted in Chronic illness, Health, lifestyle, Personal

Straight out of the blue

Imagine turbulents at sea and how you’d feel …

This is how my Dr has explained to me what labrynthitis is… I have inflammation of the inner ear that causes your balance to be very distorted. I can’t move my head and if I try to look about the room feels like it’s spinning. So I’m literally confined to my bed and my head in one position until it passes.

Let’s hope it’s not too long a feeling. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone 😣

Posted in Chronic illness, Health, lifestyle, Personal

My Surgery

Most of my posts have been written in advance as I didn’t know how I was going to be feeling after my surgery. I usually write and publish my blog posts the same day but I had to think ahead.

So I thought I’d just write a short question and answer about my surgery and how I’m feeling

  1. What surgery did I have: I had my bladder removed it took 9 hours as they wanted to save my bowel and uterus as they were stuck together with adhesions.
  2. Did you have to have anything done to prep you for it: I had to drink these vile drinks for 2 days then alter my eating to softish food. It was a bit of a struggle but I did it.
  3. How long is recovery expected to be: some people are still recovering years later but I’ve been told I can’t lift anything heavier than a kettle for 6 months or more. My niece will just have to come cuddle up on the other side as she’s getting a lump at nearly 3 so I’m not up for doing myself damage.
  4. Are the staff nice: Overall they are all really nice and helpful and reassure me when I’m a bit scared
  5. What’s the hospital food like:to be honest because my appetite has gone a bit I’ve not ate very much at all. The food I have had is edible just not a variety that I see on the menu they bring round.
  6. What are you doing to pass the time: for the first couple of days / nearly a week I felt pretty rotten and been dosed up with painkillers. When I have been ok I’ve watched the TV they have in my room then the occasional Netflix film or YouTube video.
  7. Do you have to adapt to anything differently: yes plenty. I now have a bag stuck to my body that needs to be very well looked after and of course the stoma itself. It’ll all come with practise.
  8. A positive message for others facing surgery: keep a positive head, a strong mind will get you through anything.
Posted in Chronic illness, Health, lifestyle, mental health, Personal, Positivity

Prepping for my operation

I say I am not scared but deep down I’m bricking it.

So on Friday I had to go to hospital to get ‘marked up ‘ which means they get a permanent marker and draw on where they think my stoma will go to and how high I wear my trousers so this is what my tummy looks like at the mo.

On Saturday I had to have my last substantial meal but also 3 of these build up drinks called fortisips. Luckily I like the 2 flavours they gave me – Apricot and vanilla. I must say it was hard drinking them as they are like a milkshake but fill you up a lot more.

I tried to distract myself from thinking too much about it and watched a bit of eye candy on the TV – Micky Flanagan. I know he’s not your typical hunk but there’s just something about him 😍

Today’s Sunday and I’ve got to seriously get sorted because tomorrow is the day.

I have to make sure all is packed in my bag the essentials and mum said she can bring things up at a later date when I’m feeling a bit more human. I have to stop eating properly at 2pm and can have jelly and ice cream til midnight if I am hungry. The dreaded drinks I have another 6 to drink today and then 2 Monday in the morning before surgery.

I’m going to enjoy a nice soak in the shower as I dunno when I’ll be able to have my next one. I bought Bohemian Rhapsody on DVD so that’ll be tonight’s viewing before I attempt to get a bit of shut eye before my 5am wake up call.

I’ve got some scheduled blog posts for 2 weeks so I hope you’ll enjoy them.

Posted in blog, Chronic illness, Health, lifestyle, Personal

Don’t push yourself too much

I know that the saying goes put your all into everything.

But honestly, be realistic about how much you can do and don’t make yourself feel shit in the process.

I myself have been putting pressure on myself to make podcasts and try and help others and give myself purpose.

Truth be told: At the moment my body paralysis is all over the place – possibly stress related but still not been proven. Anxiety has been present and my bladder is always problematic.

I can’t help these issues but i can not put so much pressure on myself and just help one person at a time when they need it.

My message to you is: Your goal will always be there, don’t rush. It will be worth it in the end.

Posted in Health, mental health, Personal, Positive thinking

Just breathe…Don’t panic

Over the last few days i have needed to try something a little different to unwind.

My health has been rather pants of late. My body paralysis has been a bit all over the place and my bladder is being evicted in a few months…you know back in the health update saying we were trying to dodge a big op…well it’s got rather desperate and am in need of a urostomy – a pee bag. So anxiety has been a bit erratic as you can imagine.

So i have changed the way i try to relax. Using a few apps on my phone

INSIGHT TIMER

It gives you guided meditation for all sorts of different aspects of life and i really like the timer part of it. You set the time and the sound you find soothing and away you go.

DAYLIO

If you want to keep a track of your moods and activities to look back on then the daylio app is great. As you can see you can edit your moods as i have and also the activities are editable too – still need to do mine. You can also add a little bit about your day too, like a diary. I like it so far.

Don’t be afraid to change bits of your routine to help you along the way.

Thanks for stopping by

Til next time