Tag: life struggles

Standing up to a bully

After 17 years – that’s how long since I left school you would think that bullying may have been a thing of the past. To be honest I think it’s got 10 times worse.

I was sadly a victim of bullying from alot of my year at school all because my skin wasn’t clear. I was verbally abused and then come the end of school physically.

It won’t ever leave me, but I always think I never want anyone else to have the sadness and pain I did. I know in reality that there will be thousands in the world who will feel the same pain.

Here is how you can spot a cactus friend – those that pretend to be your friend then stab you in the back…and a flower friend – the ones who truly love you and love to see you bloom.

They say it takes a bigger person to walk away from a bully. If you feel strong enough inside to stand up for yourself then don’t let someone walk all over you. But in turn don’t be horrible and become a bully in the process.

Bullying doesn’t just doesn’t happen when you’re young… People of any age fall victim and its so very sad. Cyber crime is on the up as people find it an easy way to target the vulnerable.

If we keep speaking about anti bullying, and looking after ourselves and our friends maybe one day it’ll be something we don’t have to worry about.

Mental health awareness

Since its Mental health awareness day today I thought I’d share a few quotes which I think could be quite helpful or relatable.

Never be afraid to let your guard down, take off that brave face and open up and talk. Never suffer alone.

Things insensitive people say on the outside that really doesn’t help you or your mental health. Concentrate on the inside and those who want to understand the issues you’re facing.

Please know that you can’t simply be strong everyday, it’s just impossible. Even the strongest have bad days.

Go on the day the best you can and seek nobody else’s approval.

Please remember to take care of number one… Which is you ♥️

Get your creative juices going

I have over the last few weeks been trying to find something that can relax me and low and behold I could do it from the comfort of my Ipad.

So I already had a quite neat stylus pen I got a while ago so downloaded a few sketching apps such as Adobe sketch and procreate and just tried to let my creativity flow…

Here is what I have done so far

The last one is of my sister… She thought it was quite funny seeing herself in a sketch and said it was really good for a starter like me.

I hope to improve each time I draw.

Don’t ever shy away from trying something new as you never know if you like it if you don’t try it.

Bullied for being me

After watching the tear jerking documentary with little mix Jesy Nelson ‘odd one out’ it didn’t half bring back all the feelings of what happened to me.

Life from the age of 11 was not how I envisioned it to be. I guess starting puberty that early didn’t help.

I was pretty much the only one for a few years that suffered with acne which of course made me the target for name calling and just making me feel like shit.

I had even a group of so called friends turn on me and taunt me inside of school and out. Our phone had to be unplugged as they were prank phoning every time you put it down for about 5 hours a day of a weekend 😔 it was horrendous looking back

These would in turn be the ones who beat me black and blue 2 weeks before my exams. My prom photos weren’t the ones I wished for as my face was still too sore for make up.

It took a good 5 years to actually get them out my head and life. But I don’t know why it still happens daily to people. It’s just not called for and it makes me so fierce when you see people take their lives because of it.

Bullies are just insecure about their own lives and instead of facing their problems they make sure someone else is miserable too.

My advice is to never suffer in silence. You deserve a happy life so don’t be made to feel miserable in the process.

Day in the life…

I say day in the life, this isn’t a typical day it’s what happened today.

I had to get up super early as we are having our ensuite made into a wet room so I can manoeuvre about a bit as our shower was tiny and when my mobility is crap it wasn’t very practical. So the work men have been in since Monday.

Mum had to wash my hair over the sink in the kitchen this morning, luckily it’s short and doesn’t take too long.

Then mid morning I had to go have some blood tests as after the op I had they need to do it every 3-4 months to keep an eye. I’m also getting tested for diabetes as I’ve not been feeling full par of late and a few symptoms of type 2 are what I’m experiencing. I’ll let you know what that outcome is.

So naughty I know but mum treated me and her to a chippy lunch. We normally have one naughty day and that was today. It was really yummy.

My anxiety and chronic fatigue has been playing up lately so I took myself up to my room this afternoon and just led on top of my bed and tried to zone out… Bit hard with the banging from the work men but it’ll be worth all the noise.

Still wearing this smile at the end of the day.

Gonna say nighty night and I hope you all have had a great day.

Til next time

Straight out of the blue

Imagine turbulents at sea and how you’d feel …

This is how my Dr has explained to me what labrynthitis is… I have inflammation of the inner ear that causes your balance to be very distorted. I can’t move my head and if I try to look about the room feels like it’s spinning. So I’m literally confined to my bed and my head in one position until it passes.

Let’s hope it’s not too long a feeling. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone 😣

My Surgery

Most of my posts have been written in advance as I didn’t know how I was going to be feeling after my surgery. I usually write and publish my blog posts the same day but I had to think ahead.

So I thought I’d just write a short question and answer about my surgery and how I’m feeling

  1. What surgery did I have: I had my bladder removed it took 9 hours as they wanted to save my bowel and uterus as they were stuck together with adhesions.
  2. Did you have to have anything done to prep you for it: I had to drink these vile drinks for 2 days then alter my eating to softish food. It was a bit of a struggle but I did it.
  3. How long is recovery expected to be: some people are still recovering years later but I’ve been told I can’t lift anything heavier than a kettle for 6 months or more. My niece will just have to come cuddle up on the other side as she’s getting a lump at nearly 3 so I’m not up for doing myself damage.
  4. Are the staff nice: Overall they are all really nice and helpful and reassure me when I’m a bit scared
  5. What’s the hospital food like:to be honest because my appetite has gone a bit I’ve not ate very much at all. The food I have had is edible just not a variety that I see on the menu they bring round.
  6. What are you doing to pass the time: for the first couple of days / nearly a week I felt pretty rotten and been dosed up with painkillers. When I have been ok I’ve watched the TV they have in my room then the occasional Netflix film or YouTube video.
  7. Do you have to adapt to anything differently: yes plenty. I now have a bag stuck to my body that needs to be very well looked after and of course the stoma itself. It’ll all come with practise.
  8. A positive message for others facing surgery: keep a positive head, a strong mind will get you through anything.