Be the real you and stay true

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So you are sat there in the tub, not feeling to great about yourself, about your self worth or self esteem. It has been knocked down by someone on social media.

Whilst nosing through your feed you notice that certain people are getting more likes on their pictures and you may think well i put in just as much effort in mine and i don’t seem to get half as much engagement. Feels like a kick in the teeth for all your hard work.

Please don’t sit there in a bad mood. It really isn’t the end of the world, give yourself 5 minutes of angry time and take these tips from me and use them each time you feel yourself not feeling worth it.

If you take my advice you wont ever get a down day again when it comes to scrolling through social media.

Much loves and always keep your chin up.

Til next time

My Anxiety Tips

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If you aren’t a regular reader here you won’t know my anxiety history. I’ll leave my story of how it started here incase you want to have a nosey.

Let’s just say I’ve had it for going on 2 decades and I’ve picked up some helpful coping strategies.

❤️ When you feel an anxiety attack coming on, try and get out into the fresh air and sit down if possible. I get hot and lightheaded in an attack so fresh air and somewhere to perch my bum is much needed.

❤️ The main thing is to concentrate on your breathing to try bring it back to normal. So breath in for 4, hold for 7 and let out for 8. I thought oh my goodness I can’t breath in for that long. But it really does work.

♥️ I have always found music to be the perfect distraction when I’m anxious. In particular I like soft music like acoustic or love songs. Songs that have great lyrics you can focus on. I also love listening to a crackling fire on the relaxing sounds app. Alternatively if you want loud music to try drown out the anxious thoughts that helps too in my opinion.

♥️ You’ve all heard of the grounding tip of things you can see etc using all your senses. Well I’ve come up with this one.

In your bag have something that has a scent that makes you happy like your fave perfume or cologne. I do love lavender too so some essential oils are really handy too.

Have your happy photos on your phone in a folder easily accessible so you can look at them to bring your emotions back to not being stressed out.

Your phone will come for the next two senses which is listen – so it could be the music I mentioned, or some affirmations that you can pre record to remind yourself that everything is going to be ok.

Your mouth without a doubt will be dry in an anxiety attack so popping your favourite sweet in will definitely calm you down, tried and tested by me.

Last sense is touch. There are so many stress relievers out there on ebay/ wish / amazon. Having that at hand in your bag will come in so handy if that’s all you can manage to get during your attack.

♥️ Reach out and ask for help or just message/call someone you trust and say help me take my mind off things, distract me, make me laugh. Pretty sure you have one person you can turn to.

I really could go on and on and on but I think I’ll leave it there.

I’m always here for any of you if you feel the need to chat.

Hope this has been of some help.

Til next time

Take time for you

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Apologies for the absence of my blog posts, my heads been elsewhere.

I am having my big op to remove my bladder this Monday coming so I have been trying to get all bits sorted as after I’m going to be rather sore and need to take time to recover.

So today I gave myself a to do list but not one that’s going to be too much – more of a self care one so here it is

2 HOUR PHONE DETOX

I have an app called offline that you can get on the play store if you are on Android, I am pretty sure there is an alternative one for iPhone.

It stops you from using your phone for however long you set it for and only allows a few calls you’ve selected to be accepted – and I allowed Spotify so I could still listen to music. This allowed me to step back from scrolling through my phone for a few hours and do something more practical. You really should give it a go.

MEDITATION

Not all meditation requires you to sit cross legged and going ‘omm’ but if it works for you do it. I sat up in a chair – a comfortable one, and played some crackling fire music. This soothes me for some reason and I just tried to focus on happy things, letting no negativity creep in. I done that for 20 mins and my mind definitely felt clearer after. Whatever sound or location you feel you can zone out in go with it, you might surprise yourself.

FACE MASK AND EXFOLIATION

I adore a face mask.Even if you don’t want to do a full on pampering it makes you feel like you’ve had a little bit of one. The 7th heaven ones are my favourite as they are inexpensive and come in loads of different varieties from peel off to mud. I used my body scrub from The Body Shop to make my skin silky smooth. It makes your body feel loved and not neglected just cos it’s under clothes at the moment.

SORT WARDROBE OUT

I literally had a quick nosey to see if there was anything that wasn’t going to be use to me after my operation, as having a stoma bag I’m not going to be able to wear tight things for some time. I decided that I would wait til it’s nearing the summer months and just buy myself some bits then and donate the winter bits I no longer need. Instead I sorted out my handbags and found £19.25 in change. Better than a smack in the mouth mother would say…I love her sayings.

RELAX WITH A BOOK AND MUSIC

I am saving this one until bedtime. I want an earlyish night so instead of watching the TV or YouTube I’m going to have a look on the kindle store and see what book I can get stuck into. The radio station I like to listen to at night is called THE BREEZE. If you like love songs and all the soppy songs then this ones for you, bit like Magic if you’ve heard of that station.

Taking time for yourself can be as hectic or as peaceful as you choose it to be. It doesn’t hurt every once in a while to do it.

Thanks for stopping by

Until next time

Don’t ever suffer in silence like i did

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Throughout my life, if I am being honest I have suffered quite a bit other than my health over the 33 years of my life.

Here are a few I’ll mention:

  • Bullied severely at school – police were involved come the end
  • Taken advantage of whilst drunk -shame on them
  • Sexually abused – Don’t worry I’m fine, there will always be wrong’uns
  • Had depressive moments – needed medication and outpatient therapy

I will forever remember these times it’s not easy to just forget those times in my life but it won’t ever define who I am or let it ruin my life. It happened and I can’t change what happened in the past.

I can however help those people who are struggling themselves. It’s the caring side of me. I wished I had more people about in my times of need. I had a few but not that one person who I could tell everything to.

HAVE A LISTEN TO ME

Please remember that there are people out there who can help you whether they are just an ear to listen, someone in a profession that can help you in the right direction or a friend/family member.

Believe it or not, they’ve probably encountered one of your problems and can aid you back to smiley happier you.

If you ever need someone to chat to online feel free to inbox me on the below social media pages

Thanks for stopping by

Til next time

Head in a book

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Once i get stuck into a good book there’s no pulling me away from it. I don’t tend to read loads of books simply because…The problem is trying to get stuck in to one in the first place.

So i guess i wanna try set myself a goal of reading 1 self help book a month and one that will entertain me or have me weeping.

So here is my first two

Has an interesting title. Lets hope its a good read.

I know Louise Hay books are loved the world over so i look forward to hopefully falling in love with it too.

In a months time I’ll let you know how i got on and will give a little review too.

Give me a kick up the bum, i need it.

Til next time

Just breathe…Don’t panic

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Over the last few days i have needed to try something a little different to unwind.

My health has been rather pants of late. My body paralysis has been a bit all over the place and my bladder is being evicted in a few months…you know back in the health update saying we were trying to dodge a big op…well it’s got rather desperate and am in need of a urostomy – a pee bag. So anxiety has been a bit erratic as you can imagine.

So i have changed the way i try to relax. Using a few apps on my phone

INSIGHT TIMER

It gives you guided meditation for all sorts of different aspects of life and i really like the timer part of it. You set the time and the sound you find soothing and away you go.

DAYLIO

If you want to keep a track of your moods and activities to look back on then the daylio app is great. As you can see you can edit your moods as i have and also the activities are editable too – still need to do mine. You can also add a little bit about your day too, like a diary. I like it so far.

Don’t be afraid to change bits of your routine to help you along the way.

Thanks for stopping by

Til next time

Beat the January blues

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I’m speaking from past experiences but doesn’t January just put you out of sorts. Literally at the stroke of midnight New Year’s Eve and bam 💥 you’re in another month…another year nonetheless and I know some people just hate change. It’s like you are expected to put on a happy face and celebrate…

Don’t be ashamed, it’s ok to feel underwhelmed.

Here are 10 things to do to help you feel a little more happier if only a little bit

  • Write down 5 things that immediately bring a smile to your face
  • Eat your favourite meal – whether you cook it or order it in
  • Look through photos that hold great memories
  • Give yourself a little pampering – you’re worth it
  • Give your bedroom/living space a makeover
  • Phone a friend and just chat – it’s good to talk
  • Make yourself a playlist of music that gets your heart singing as well as you
  • Order yourself a few items of clothing, It’s surprising how much of a difference it can make to your mood
  • Get writing. Whatever is on your mind write it down, it’s s great form of self reflection and therapy.
  • Plan a day/evening out with a friend or family member. It’ll do you good to let your hair down.

Look at January like this it’s half way through the month  now. You’ve made it this far. So take it day by day and appreciate the littlest things that do make you grin.

Always feel free to DM me on my twitter or instagram page below

Til next time my sweet ones

Look at the sky tell me what do you see – MENTAL HEALTH TALK

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To you looking at these pictures below they may just look like different times of the day. But i want you to look at them slightly differently.

This picture symbolises a good day to someone who suffers with any sort of mental health issue. They may not have many of them but this shows that there are brighter days and just to keep the faith as the saying goes.

This is on their not so good days and when they may need someone to reach out and let them know that they are not alone and everything will be ok eventually.

Then there are those that see this and everything is dark, out of focus and can’t see which way to go. This is when you really need to take action for the person suffering so badly. They need to see that brighter sky again and sometimes just on their own they don’t have the courage or strength to do it. That’s where you can be the light at the end of the tunnel.

Don’t forget you may be having the best day where someones living their worst. Find a heart to help anyone in need.

Thanks for stopping by

Til next time

Let’s get spiritual

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I am only just getting into finding out about all things spiritual.

You see i have had alot of upset in my life of late and i am one to be positive and at peace with things as you all know.

Its come to mind that when i want a bit of a a chill out sesh and not sleep just to get in a different mindset i thought I’d try out some spiritual stuff so I’m just as new to it as you.

I have found 12 gemstones i want to get that have different meanings and properties to them.

Here they are

  • Onyx- Blocking negativity, patience, determination
  • Rose Quartz- unconditional love, emotional healing, compassion
  • Amethyst- Intuition, balance, higher wisdom
  • Opal- inspiration, creativity, aids pain
  • Citrine- Brightness, positivity, clearing
  • Lapis Lazuli- psychic vision, celestial energy, nobility

  • Topaz- affection, sweetness, disposition
  • Aquamarine – luck, fearlessness, protection
  • Jade – purity, friendship, peace
  • Garnet- Self esteem, victory, eternal love
  • Bloodstone- Alignment, Generosity, good fortune,
  • Agate – self confidence, mental strength, calmness

I really want to get all 12 but need to find a decent place to find them. I truly do think if you believe in the magic of them they can work for you.

Til next time

AN ANXIOUS MOMENT

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Today i set off not anxious at all. Waiting to get on the bus in my electric wheelchair with Mum to go have lunch my head filled with fear.

I had been on a bus in my self propelling wheelchair and had no problems but because my mobility in my arms have been affected too i have to start using a electric powerchair instead.

It was the anticipation of would i be able to get on and off without feeling like I’m gonna fall out of it…I’m in control as mum can’t push this one. I knew there was people there to help but i don’t want to always need help i want my independence.

Well i managed to control the anxiety in the end and I’m proud i can tick it off as something i wanted to be able to do.

I am seriously thinking about writing a anxiety book as i have had 18 years battling it.

Who would be interested if i published it?

Thanks for stopping by

Til next time